FAQ: Funeral Services

Throughout human history and across cultures around the world, people have gathered to acknowledge the death of a member of their community. Regardless of who the person was, a funeral ceremony is often the one—and sometimes only—opportunity for people to come together, recognize a shared loss, and support one another through grief.

According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the national median cost of a funeral in 2012 was $7,045. If a burial vault is required by the cemetery—as is often the case—that cost can increase to approximately $8,343. While these figures provide helpful context, the cost of a funeral ultimately depends on the specific services and products chosen by the family.

Your funeral director will take time to explain all available options, ask thoughtful questions about budget considerations, and help guide decisions with care. The goal is to create a funeral, memorial service, or celebration of life that reflects your wishes and values while remaining aligned with your financial expectations.

Comparing the costs of funerals, memorial services, and celebrations of life is a bit like comparing apples, oranges, and mangoes—it’s not a direct comparison. Instead, it’s more helpful to think of them as points along a spectrum of ceremonial options. On one end is the funeral, on the other is the celebration of life, with the memorial service falling somewhere in between.

A traditional funeral is often the most expensive of the three, particularly because the cost of a casket can represent a significant portion of the overall expense. Ultimately, the cost of any option depends entirely on the choices made during the arrangement conference and the services selected.

Deciding who should attend a funeral is much like deciding who to invite to a wedding—those who would want to be there. A person’s role at a funeral is twofold: to show support for the bereaved family and to tend to their own grief. Funeral gatherings provide a shared, supportive space where people can begin to come to terms with the loss of someone they cared for.

Formal invitations are not typically sent for funerals. Instead, service details are usually shared through newspapers or online notices, allowing those who wish to attend to do so. That said, it can be thoughtful to personally reach out—by phone, email, or social media—to certain individuals to ensure they are aware of the service and to let them know their presence would be meaningful.

When considering a guest list, trust both your heart and your judgment. You know who mattered most to your loved one and who would find comfort in attending. Above all, be mindful of the venue’s capacity and avoid inviting more people than the space can comfortably accommodate.

Flowers create a sense of warmth and beauty that adds to the dignity and comfort of a funeral service. While they may not be necessary, flowers serve an important purpose—offering a visual expression of sympathy, love, and respect, and providing a quiet way to show support during an end-of-life ceremony.

The preparation of the deceased involves a series of carefully performed steps carried out by trained and licensed embalmers and restorative artists. Without going into unnecessary detail, the body is temporarily preserved through embalming, refrigeration, or a combination of both. It is then washed, dressed, and gently groomed before being placed in the selected casket for viewing.

If you would like to learn more about this process, we are always available to answer questions. There are also reputable resources available online that explain these steps in greater detail.

Human beings are complex, and at times, we need to see in order to truly accept what has happened. Viewing offers a way to acknowledge the reality of death while also providing a meaningful opportunity to say goodbye. For many, it can be a cathartic moment—one in which unspoken words are shared, lingering emotions are released, and a sense of peace begins to take shape.

When asked how to talk with children about a funeral, honesty and awareness are key. Let them know, in simple terms, what they can expect—there may be people who feel very sad and cry, and there may be moments when others speak about how much they loved the person who died, though children are never expected to speak themselves.

Encourage questions and answer them as openly as you can, reassuring them that you will be close by throughout the experience. Children should never be forced to attend a funeral, and they should always be given the option to change their mind.

The Celebrant Foundation and Institute defines celebrants as trained professionals who believe in the value of ceremony and ritual in meeting the needs of both individuals and society. A celebrant’s role is to help create a ceremony that reflects a person’s beliefs, life philosophy, and personality.

Life-cycle celebrants are especially helpful for families without religious affiliations or a connection to a clergy member who can officiate a service. Involving a celebrant in funeral planning has been shown to enhance the experience for everyone involved. As the Institute explains, celebrants approach each ceremony without an agenda or preset expectations. Through thoughtful conversation, they focus on what is meaningful to the family and the individual being honored.

If you feel a celebrant may be a good fit for your family’s situation, please contact us for additional information.

Simply put, it depends on the service. Just as no two movies or novels share the same length or emotional scope, no two end-of-life ceremonies are exactly alike.

Black was once considered the only appropriate color to wear to a funeral, but that is no longer the case. Today, services are often less formal, and some families may even request that guests avoid wearing black altogether. If you have questions about funeral attire or etiquette, please contact us for guidance.